Self-esteem begins with self-understanding, grows with courage & perseverance, and ends with confidence – Maxime Lagace.
The term self-esteem can be seen as what we think about self; the positive or negative evaluations of self. In other words; self-esteem comes from being able to define the world in your own terms and refusing to abide by the judgment of others.
This clearly means that how we feel about self can either be low or high depending on the surrounding circumstances, but because your value does not decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth; then you should at no point inhibit low self-esteem.
It is important to note that low self-esteem can be emotionally and socially harmful for the individual, hence the need for a balance. The need for a balance begins from understanding what needs to be balanced; just as the Englishman would say “a solution can’t be proffered if the problem is not known”.
Some indices that characterize low self-esteem include; Depression/sadness, anxieties, feeling of inadequacy, comparing self negatively to others, difficulty accepting compliments, neglect of own needs; particularly emotional ones, difficulty maintaining/making relationships, difficulty trusting own judgment, distorted view of self, avoiding of social situations, low mood, etc.
Developing one’s self-esteem is a process as it won’t happen overnight, but there are things you can do to get it started and keep it moving. These include; but not limited to:
- Mastering a new skill that corresponds with your talents and interests.
- Write a list of everything you have achieved that made you feel proud and review the list whenever you need a reminder of your ability to get things done.
- Do something creative as creativity stimulates the brain.
- Get clear on your values, the more you know what you stand for, the more confident you will be.
- Stretch yourself and move to the edge of your comfort zone.
- Use your talents, gifts and abilities to offer a direct assistance to someone.
- Seek the support of a trained counselor to help heal your past so you can move unto the future in a confident and self-assured way.
- Make a firm decision to stop worrying about what other people think, rather make choices on what you want.
- Read something that lifts you up and make you feel positive about yourself.
- Surround yourself with supportive positive people who admire and value you, let negative people go.
- Do not allow others control or manipulate you, maintain firm boundaries.
- Welcome failure as a growth because failure means you’re making an effort/progress.
- Allow yourself to feel afraid, but keep going.